What a comfort to know that the Lord is near those who are suffering! Today is a hard day for me. I'm not quite suffering, but still a little broken-hearted. Today is the day my mom, Marky Triplett, passed away eight years ago from AML. Leukemia. She passed away exactly three weeks after her diagnosis, and her funeral was on her actual 60th birthday. I still can't believe she's really gone. I almost picked up the phone to call her last Sunday. After all this time, I still have the urge to call her and then get that punched-in-the-gut feeling when I remember she's gone.
I don't talk about it a lot because it hurts but I still think about her everyday. I think about her as I watch my children laugh, thinking how much she would have loved them. I think about her when I have to run around the house chasing a ringing phone. I remember how funny I thought it was that she would carry her cordless phone in her front robe pocket so she never missed our calls. I wish I had a robe with front pockets now! I think about her when I drive down State Street. To this day I take High Street exit to avoid driving past Baptist Hospital, and remembering the night she passed away. I think about her when I see queso dip at a Mexican restaurant because that was what I was eating on my lunch break with Julie Jackson when my Dad called to tell me I needed to come to the hospital soon. She's always on my mind, and always in that special place in your heart reserved for your mom.
My mom meant so much to me. She loved us all unconditionally, and was always on our side. If I had a bad attitude or was disrespectful, she always blamed it on whoever I had been around. Someone MUST have been a bad influence on me because she KNEW I could never be so disobedient on my own. She was always there when I needed her, such a good listener. I remember her hilarious sense of humor, and the funny things she would say. She was just entertaining to be around, and I hope my children will love me like I loved my mom.
You're told that time heals the pain, and it does get so easier, but I can't help but feel cheated sometimes. My first birthday after she passed away was especially hard. It was the day I realized that nobody celebrates your birthday with you quite like your mom does. She and my Dad sang to me every birthday morning for 32 years, and it just wasn't the same with just his voice alone. Dads voice was comforting, but I wanted my mom to tell me the story again of the day I was born. How she watched the Kentucky Derby from her hospital room because she was hospitalized for a few days before, how my Dad wore a suit to the hospital on the day I was born, how they couldn't believe they finally had a girl,.... you know, the things your mom reminds you of every birthday! I miss that.
We never fully understand Gods plan or his timing, but I really wish Tripp and Mollie could have known the love of BOTH of their precious grandmothers. My mom couldn't wait to have grandchildren, and would have been so proud of these two little ones. Curt and I laugh about it sometimes when we realize that God knew when he gave our children their Kaye-Kaye, that her heart is so big that she's able to love them enough for TWO grandmothers. I'm so thankful we have her!
I especially missed my mom on the day Mollie was born. I was sedated during an emergency c-section, and do not remember Mollie's delivery, but I remember waking up in a recovery room with Mollie for the first time. I looked at those little alert eyes, and for the first time realized that she was here, and was a baby girl! I reached for the phone to call my mom to tell her that I had a baby girl, but then remembered she was gone. But it was okay, because I knew that I was beginning a new chapter, and that I could love this little baby girl like my mom had loved me.
I wish my mom could have gotten to know Curt. She would have been so proud that he was her son-in-law. We first knew Curt was a special guy when he sent my mother flowers in her hospital room on Valentine's Day. She called me at work when they were delivered, and we were both so touched by such a thoughtful gesture. I think she knew Curt and I would marry. She met him once during her last week. He came to the hospital to see her, and she was sitting on the side of her bed. I remember when we walked in that she glowed when she met Curt, and asked him to sit beside her. She told him that she was going to make him some sour cream enchiladas when she got out of the hospital. He's still disappointed he never got those enchiladas! Just a few days before my mom passed away, she insisted that I go home with Curt to Greenville for the first time. Curtis was being named "King of Greenville" at a Junior League Ball, and my mom was really happy that I was able to go with Curt. Here we are on that wonderful weekend.
It was a really special Valentine's weekend, and I'll always be glad she encouraged me to go, but I remember noticing that her legs had gotten really swollen when I came back on that Sunday afternoon. She died the next day from renal edema. Her body just couldn't take all the chemo. The leukemia had just taken over.
It was a really special Valentine's weekend, and I'll always be glad she encouraged me to go, but I remember noticing that her legs had gotten really swollen when I came back on that Sunday afternoon. She died the next day from renal edema. Her body just couldn't take all the chemo. The leukemia had just taken over.
I didn't know she was going to die. Even on the morning of her death, I didn't know. I stopped by to check on her on my way to work. My dad was with her. He didn't leave her that morning. He never went to work that day. I guess he knew she wasn't doing well. I knew she was really sick, but I thought she would survive. She always did, so I had no reason to think otherwise. But I returned after his call at lunch, and my mom gifted me with a beautiful smile as I walked into her hospital room. She must have known this was the end, and wanted to comfort me with that beautiful smile. She closed her eyes soon after, and then it all began. But it was still a total shock to me when the doctor called us out to the hallway that afternoon to tell us that my mothers chart instructs DNR. I remember asking the doctor if she needed to be resuscitated? She said yes, that my mother was going to die in the next few hours. I wanted to wail like the people I had read about in the Old Testament. And rip my clothes like them. It was the hardest thing I have ever been through, to watch the person that you love so much take her last breaths.
We were all there with her, and I believe she felt our love surrounding her. We gathered up all her belongings and pushed them on a cart through the hospital. And we left without her. It was a very dark time for us. My Dad slept on my couch for a few nights because her couldn't bear to go home without her. But we were comforted by knowing that we would see her again.
We selfishly missed her but we knew that in Heaven her little body was not sick anymore. And that she was happy to be reunited with her second child Mark that had died of SIDS in 1965, and that she was rejoicing with her Saviour forever! She would want us to be happy with her. How much heavier grief must be for a non-beliver, who does not believe in Heaven and the beautiful promise of seeing their loved ones again!
Here's a few pictures of my mom and dad on their wedding day, April 28, 1962, at First Baptist Church, Gulfport, MS. She looks so beautiful!
Here's a few pictures of my mom and dad on their wedding day, April 28, 1962, at First Baptist Church, Gulfport, MS. She looks so beautiful!
Thank you for joining me as I remember my mom and all that she meant to our family. She will forever be missed and I look forward to the day when I can see her again.
